The Malagasy dwarf Hippo: April 2006

4/28/06

This is just not right....

My previous post mentioned in a very casual manner the exticntanimal.com website. Today I am at it again but in no mood to joke around. I will try hard not to sound like a blowhard environmentalist because 1) I drive to work everyday when in theory, I could bike. ( not in -20C winter) 2) I do not do anything concrete about protecting the environment beside making sure the pets are happy.
Still, 2 environment-related events got me unnerved this week: 1) Bush's attempt to reduce gas price at the expense of the environmental recommendations. ( If you cannot afford gas price, I say "carpool" for a while, it can't hurt) 2) the death of 400 dolphins off the coast of Zanzibar (across from Madagascar). The cause of such massive death is obviously uncertain; yet it is highly suspected that sonar emission by a US submarine patrolling the region is implicated. I know that some people in the Bush administration could care less about the damage caused to the earth. However, there is surely a group of people with some leverage that can stop this wreckage from happening over and over again. I am really p...'ed now so I'd better stop here before I get banned for foul language.

4/26/06

Malagasy dwarf hippo and the "sportsguy"

This is cool: I once wrote an email to Bill "the sportsguy" Simmons on how he had to quit overtaking my life. ( and that because of him, my family back in Madagascar is asking who the heck the sportsguy is and if he had an actual job)
I thought he must have not even looked at the message but in his last article in ESPN magazine, he mentions out of a million extinct animals: the Malagasy dwarf hippopotamus. This is of historical proportion at many levels:
1st time for: -dwarf hippo to be mentioned in ESPN
- "Malagasy" to appear in a "sportsguy" column.
- exctinctanimals.com to be united with Mike Tyson.
-you to ever hear of Malagasy dwarf hippo.
You see ? You can witness history in the making reading this post. Jokes aside, I really believe he was throwing me a bone by picking the Malagasy dwarf hippo ( if you claim to know that such creatures existed, you either work for the commission looking for WMD in Iraq or you should participate in Jeopardy or "Question pour un champion" in French. And if you think I have too much time on my hand, you are probably right. My boss just gave an inquisitive look, Quick "CTRL + TAB" to switch to a bogus spreadsheet.

Clutch

Clutch:
1. a hand, a claw in the act of grasping
2. tense critical situation
3. tending to be successful in critical situations.

The modern times require us to perform at our best in a specific time period that will shape our future for a long while. We are reminded about the importance of performance at a given time everyday, everywhere: at work or even in our relaxed time. The saying: "timing is everything" has never been truer than now. Here are a few examples:
1) 1min30s /a week for aspiring American Idol to prove that they can sing.
2) 30 min of photo shoot and a 10 sec walk /week for "America's next top model" to nail the perfect pose ( I am watching this show to ensure harmony in the household: it's all about compromise. Nah, I actually enjoy watching it :) )
3) 0.9 s left for Anthony Johnson , perennial back-up point guard for Indiana Pacers ( NBA) to make free-throws to win the game for his team.
4) 1min left in the game for Jens Lehman, goalkeeper for Arsenal to stop a penalty shot that sends his team to its 1st Champion league's final ever.
5) 0s left: for every shot taken by Michael Jordan, Reggie Miller or Robert Horry ( or it seems so)
6) the 1st 2 min you share with someone having a heart attack.
7) 10 min per presentation to convince someone that you are the person for a job.
8) 2 min to get a phone number during speed dating.

Interestingly, one movie coming out soon will display evidence of both the best and worst timings I witnessed in a long while. The movie is United 93 which as you all know was the flight on 9-11 that was directed towards Washington DC and crashed in Pennsylvania because the passengers, aware of the attacks on WTC, fought back the terrorists.
Imagine a situation where your flight has been hijacked, you learn that other planes have been used as weapons and you are under the direct threat of armed fanatics at high altitude: coming up with the right course of action under such duress is the definition of clutch.
What is NOT clutch in my opinion is the decision to make a movie 5 years removed from such tragedy. I understand the producers asked and obtained the blessings from each families of the victims. However, it's been 5 years. I did not know anyone on the plane but I feel sad and bothered by an endeavor which ultimate goal is to make money out of such events and this early in time. It is just a gut feeling on my part and the family of the victims probably knew best. I will probably watch the movie to see for myself the information the producers have gotten to make the movie but I will always second guess myself for supporting such an early depiction of this event.

4/23/06

Why "Da Vinci Code" will top "Titanic"

Da Vinci Code is coming out May 19th. The 1st time I saw the trailer, it looked somehow familiar. How so ? Because it was depicted exactly as I imagined it as I was reading the book. (although I had Harrison Ford and Juliette Binoche in lieu of Tom Hanks and Audrey Tautou (Amelie)... off-topic: Can Tom Hanks please cut his hair now, the whole thing looks ridiculous)
A few reasons make me believe that DVC will top the likes of E.T and Spiderman in the box-office and reach "Titanic" levels ( BTW I sill don't understand the appeal of that movie) 1) we are really starved from intriguing blockbuster movies lately. It was either interesting but too challenging :) (Syriana, Brokeback Mountain, Crash) or mildly entertaining ( too many to mention. When the best movie right now is "Silent Hill", it shows the lack of quality motion pictures out there. With Da Vinci Code, There is potential here for greatness ( great plot, great subjects, great actors, great producers...) so much possibilities that I might be disappointed in the end but I don't believe so. Here are other reasons why I cannot jinx it: The best-seller book stayed in the news because of the trial that Dan Brown went through for plagiarism (which he won, no surprise there). 2) The "Gospel of Judas" phenomenon: fascinating story that merits a blurb on its own ( Judas as Jesus closest confident makes sense at many levels if you ask me but it is too long too explain) 3) The outrage generated by the storyline ( Alleged Jesus and Mary Magdalene descendants covered by Church) will be renewed pushing Christians, atheists and feminists to the theaters. 4) Aspiring art historians everywhere will come for the exclusive perspective on le Louvre and Winchester Cathedral. 5) Audrey Tautou and Jean Reno. Nuff said 6) Did I mention the "secret de Polichinelle" of the book: "Jesus' descendants is the Holy Grail" ?
So if I were a gambling man, I would say 400 millions at the box-office when all is said and done. But I am not ( as far as you know )

Interesting factoids about Namibia

So "Brangelina: the(genetic) sequel" will be Namibian as the Pitt-Jolie baby kid will see the first daylight in a secluded Namibian resort. I am sure Namibian people are slightly annoyed at the sudden interest in their countries because of Hollywood drama. People outside barely knew or cared before and now everybody is suddenly an expert on Namibia ? ( I felt it a bit with the release of "Madagascar: the movie") My advice: embrace the attention and turn people to what the country has to offer.
So here is my own Namibia factoids:
1) Frankie Fredericks is the most underrated class athlete in the world. If it were not for the dope-suspicious performances of the likes of Christie and Michael Johnson Frankie could have had a few gold medals by now. Yet he always was very quiet and classy in victory and defeat. Oh and he ran the 100m dash in 9.86s and the 200m in 19.68s: Not Bad !
2) The country is one the youngest in the world: 17. Not old enough to drink or vote. Still, already home of most famous celebrities' offspring. Our most famous Malagasy offsrping would be... dang, little help here please ?
3)Oshiwambo, English, Afrikaans and German are spoken there.
4) Windhoek ( corner of wind) is famous for its hot springs
5)The busiest airport is Eros: of course, it is. Now we know why Brangelina picked Namibia. Madagascar should name our next airport Amore. Our chances to get the Ledger-Williams offsrping would increase 100%.
Good luck Namibia and Brangelina with each other.

4/20/06

Malagasy tennis club rivalries

Apparently my very light trash talk about the tennis club rivalry we had back in Tana was well received by some and not so well by others. I send a message video to my cousin Andry for his wedding where I was referencing to our childhood glory days of playing decent tennis. Specifically, I was pointing out how we got lucky one day and pulled an upset that still make me smile to this day. A little background to recap: our tennis club ( my cousins and I) is a small club (COT) on the outside of Tana (Ilafy) that he is known for the landscape more than their athletes. Everyone knows each other ( family atmosphere if you will). Other clubs such as ACSA ( downtown) and ASUT ( university) usually collect the best athletes and are the farm school for aspiring tennis pro ( Dally Randriatefy used to play for both clubs). Most tananarivian people who played tennis did so either in ACSA or ASUT ( Hence the hate mail I got lately :) ). So it was a big deal when an interclub match-up was organized between the youth of ASUT and COT. I was 12 at the time and we were all b/w 10 and 18. Everyone on our side played 3 singles and 2 doubles because we had 3 times less players. We were supposed to be wiped out by the big school who had 5 Malagasy top players (men and women) from each age categories. What do you know ? In our version of "Hoosiers", we won 21 games to ASUT 18 as all 10 of us played at least once the best game of their short career :). It prompted the opposite dejected coach to say: "we have quantity but you have quality". I kid you not; that day is still, until now, one of my favorite childhod memory :) Of course, we got trashed on the rematch a week later but no one can take a away the last 20 minutes of that day where all 10 of us cheered on at the courtside our 10 year -old cousin (Lalaina) clinching the victory for us. So when Andry gave the "thumbs up" as I mentioned that memorable day for us, it meant a little more than just a silly tennis game or making fun of ASUT fans. It was celebrating "growing up in Tana" with all the cousins and enjoying every bit of it ! So to all ASUT and ACSA loyalists ( one is family now ) out there, you guys are alright:) but once in a while "le petit poucet", the underdog, comes out on top and I am sure even you guys can appreciate that :)

the week from hell is finally ovah :)

Quick news about the daily life from tis corner of the world: I held my annual committee meeting today. It was basically 4 professors evaluating whether you are worthy of becoming a research scientist based on your progress over the past year. It took me a week to write the report and a couple of days to get over my glossophobia and prepare the presentation. I did not drink before the meeting as I planned earlier (although I wish I did because I was a nervous wreck the whole 2 1/2 hours) It turns out it went quite well after all. The presentation was dreadful in my opinion: my brain started to go 100 mil/h to nowhere and I spoke like those tapes that you run on 4X speed. Awful feeling, I kid you not. Still, they were pleased enough to ask me what I wanted to do next (after the PhD). Well getting a real job would be a start :). I had not the slightest idea what to do next except kicking back with the GB's and finishing writing this stupid study. That's me ( and most guys ) in a nutshell: no foresight, no long-term plan but I have not been too unhappy so far so why change ? :)

4/19/06

Vola and Andry's big day

I mentioned earlier that I was kind of sad that I had to miss out on my cousin's and childhood pal wedding back home. I even had the misfortune of having the busiest work day of the year on the same day of his wedding. I managed to send a message video to the newlyweds before hand though and today I got a really nice message from him that made the whole "missing-out" thing less painful. It is a very rewarding feeling in a relationship when people may lose direct contact for a while, miss out on big events, yet still know that in the bigger scheme of things, that bond nurtured for 20 years is still indelible. So here's to the newlyweds and to more happy news very soon.

4/16/06

celebrity look-alike ( oh vanitas vanitatum :)

We had good fun with this webiste that Ranjit found: myheritage.com,it matches your picture with their celebrities image database and compute the one with the best ressemblance :)
The best part are the cross-gender celebrity that matches your picture. Anyhoo, here are my matches: so in theory if one could mix equally all those people, they would tun out as my clone: Oh the humanity ! ( vanity is one of the 7 deadly sins heh? ) Interesting that the only common match between Ranjit and I is Mischa Barton from the OC ( you would think from the previous post that there would be more), here is the link for his match.

4/15/06

How black isTiger Woods ? (or Joakim Noah and Barack Obama for that matter )

Tiger Woods is used to receiving hate mail. That is part of the drill when you are successful at a sport that is still regarded by many as a old white men club only. It is unlikely that golfers demographics will change soon when you look at the membership fees for entering a club-house. I do enjoy my 18-hole trot from time to time but the atmosphere generated by the whole rich members-only tradition is lost on me. Anyway, Tiger woods hate-mail lately have come for the black community who resents the fact that he refuses to be "labeled" as African-American. He says that is not who I am: I am a 'Cablinasian'": as in Caucasian-black-Indian-Asian. To which Colin Powell responded: "In America, which I love from the depths of my heart and soul, when you look like me, you're black." ( I think a lot of black Europeans can relate to that ). I applaud Tiger Woods for taking charge of his identity, promoting multiculturalism and not accepting anyone else but him to dictate his ethnicity. The question derived from this issue is several fold: 1) Why did it matter so much to the black community that Tiger Woods claims he is one of them and one of them only ? 2) Do we seriously need to have a hierarchy that needs to be implemented when it comes to our race when we are multiracial ? 3) were we to choose to put a hierarchy, wouldn't one always pick the community that would embrace him/her more readily?
1) It matters to a community that is underprivileged to not only see one of their own succeed but to see one of their own recognize their community when they succeed. It is not a trivial matter. It gives hope and confidence that success is also a possible feat coming from this community. That is a the consequence of a society where a black person is perceived as more likely to rob a house than be a good golfer. Therefore, I applaud any minorities who succeed then recognize and give back to their own communities. It matters more to them, so it's all for the best. The same can be applied at the global level: if a Malagasy fellow achieve global success or excellence in any field , I would have no quarrel with the fact that he raises the Malagasy flag every time he can. It may seem silly to others but it is important to those watching back home and it does put the "nation on the global map" ( as irrelevant as it sounds, such details can change general perception of a country).
2) a multicultural (or multiracial) person is not an exception anymore. The concept is not novel nor difficult to comprehend. Classifying someone as from here or there is just taking the easy way to try to get a grasp of his/her individuality. Boring...
3) The African-American community is full of universal success stories/people: MLK, Ali, J.C Owens, Jackie Robinson, Spike lee etc.... So Tiger's story would not have made much of a difference at this point. Now, since black and Thai communities seemed to care more about his success, why wouldn't he embrace these parts of his identity more willingly ? It would seem that the community more in need of a global representative would support more forcefully.

So Tiger, it's time to embrace the native American cause and hammer the 3-wood with war paint on your face. ;) or better yet, ignore the haters and stupid suggestions and start a foundation open to any kids who want to do something of their lives ....Oh, you did already ? ooops. ;)

Back to the real world !

After a week totally dedicated to writting my annual report and spending way too much time with my boss ( lovely person, but there is such a thing as too many one-on-one meetings ), I am psyched to be back in the real world. It all happended the same week as my childhood friend's ( and cousin) wedding and I feel like I totally missed out on this special occasion. I am thrilled for him and his newlywed lady. I am also happy because I got back to surfing the web and see what my favorite bloggers are talking about. I just realized yesterday that I did not have internet connection for a week on my laptop. How did I manage ? :-) There were great reads all over the blogosphere, ! Boy, did I miss the outside world and the virtual world !I still have to actually hold my meeting but this should be much less painful as my report is still very much engraved in my head. I have plenty of topics I wish to rant about but I don't want to butcher them. Therefore, I will take a stroll outside, enjoy the beautiful spring around here and literally "go out and smell the roses". :) Venting about the state of world will have to wait for a while :).
Potential subjects for the rants : "Da vinci code" as a feminist book, why global exposure matters and How "black" are Tiger Woods, Joakim Noah and Barack Obama ?" )

Have a relaxing week-end !

4/8/06

l'annee ou tout le monde parlait le singe...

elle: loukatilosouk! Qui vascalava? No bibi hin!
lui:Calmina ma loviniou
Elle:Ma so cradopoulo!
Lui:Daqui OMO micro é crapoto bastafouitt !
Elle: Oh so touti minirikiki!
Lui: Ma kif kif costo
Elle:Humm, qué séra séra Elle:Oh sobonoclin lo milou é so doudou locoto Bravomomicro (en l'embrassant: )Humm gro crapoulo OMO Micro, lo touti rikiki, maousse costo.
(OMO decembre 1991-92, et oui 25 ans deja....)
(Merci MBW pour le "tip")
( ref: http://www.rom.fr/martel/html/jargon.html)

PS: Que veut dire exactement sobonoclin lo milou ?
PPS: Mon surnom au lycee etait "Rakoto bastafouitt" ( je ne lui en veut pas car tout le monde l'appellait "bettlejuice" a cause d'une de mes references sur ses habitudes hygieniques a l'internat. 1 partout balle au centre)

4/6/06

riding the "Segolene Royal" wave...

After my cheap shot at "frere Jacques (Chirac)" ( I already lauded him plenty for standing up as the voice of reason during the Iraq fiasco), I felt like I owed a bit of positive vibes to the current french political scene. 3 years ago, the left-leaning opposition party did not have a viable candidate to counter the heavyweight from the governing party. It was a mano a mano between De Villepin and Sarkozy. The best part of French politics and maybe its eventual downfall is its reluctance to follow the bipartisanship system that is in order in the Us. So The Socialist Party was an afterthought on the political scene until the "Segolene" wave stole the spotlight. She never officially entered her candidacy to the presidential elections and consciously veiled some of her public persona, leaving the media wanting for more. In this age of women empowerment (Merckel, Bachelet, Taylor..) her timing could not be better. She is atypical: 4 children but not wedded to her PACS partner Hollande who also has also presidential aspirations, and refreshing: she is drifting away from her party's directives more often that not. The mystery surrounding her and her original stance are probably her best assets because the french voters seem to be saturated with their old-fashioned politicians. Her critics often point at her lack of agenda or concrete strategy were she to gain the highest authority. I am not a political buff and I follow french politics with a casual amused interest. However, the surprising appeal of Segolene Royal caught my attention. I have no doubt that she is as qualified as any candidates and her hidden strength of caracter comes through on specific issues. However, I cannot shake the feeling that she is a "by default" choice for many voters. Royal is thriving at a time when most politicians in France have either dissapointed or scared the voters to death. Unfortunately, this type of situation seems to be the norm in world politics as leaders in general have failed to inspire more than remote interests. Madagacar is also struggling to find a decent alternative to the incumbent president ( maybe he is just doing a terrific job, who knows ? Still some kind of opposition would be nice. you know... to validate the whole concept of democracy thingy). Let's not even mention politics in the US, where accountability is a merely an afterthought ( which makes the democracy here very similar to the "democracies" in Africa ). I digress yet again....
I am much more interested in knowing the reason why Royal and Hollande did not tie the knot? I am aware that it is a decision that concerns only them. However, they both are public persona and scrutiny from bystanders is part of the job description: so what gives ? A few option:
1) They were making a point: agreeing to PACS is as strong a commitment as a marriage without the religious undertone.
2) They wanted to give same-sex marriage a boost without actually marrying someone from the same gender. ( although she was a bit lukewarm on the LGBT support base)
3) This is a way of sticking it to their political foes by showing that it is possible to generate strong family values and ties under the PACS legal binding.
4) It was a publicity stunt.
5) A wedding was too much of an investment in time and money.

Either way, I am curious to find out whether 1) her sail would have enough wind to carry her through 2) how Hollande will react if she indeed goes through with it ( now this would be a tv reality show I would watch: "Hillary/Bill, Segolene/Francois and Michelle/Nelson: real world who is wearing the pants edition", Spielberg and Trump need to make this happen, please) 3) when Hollande propose to "PACS" her , did he still get a diamond ring or a "Lord of the rings" replica was enough ?
Have a great week-end !

4/3/06

Glossophobia (as a non-english speaker): when picturing your audience in their underwears is just not enough.....

Glossophobia: the fear of public speaking. ( Yes, I had to look it up ). With my committee meeting coming up and my defense thesis looming in the future, I am getting sweaty palms imagining those "experts"scrutinizing me and trying to figure out what they will be thinking. It got much better since freshman year because one has to go do the "song and dance" in public every so often i the us educational system. Still, my first public speaking in a foreign language was so dreadful that thereafter I carefully chose my classes to limit to a minimum the amount of those "assignements".
Apparently, I am not the only one feeling this way. Here in the US, it's the most common phobia right before the fear of death :) which led to the famous Seinfeld line : " That would mean at a funeral, people are five times more likely to want to be in the casket than giving the eulogy".
The oddity is that 1) I think at this point, I would rather give a speech in my 3rd language (English ) rather than in French or in Malagasy (I cannot explain why) 2) A speech of mine in english would still make more sense than anything the current president ever said ( in public or private) . ( OK, that was a cheap shot). In the field of science, we do not have a lot of formal communication classes. Many scientists will tell you that they chose the field so they have to deal with the minimum human factor and thus minimum human interaction. However, presenting our work is a major part of our curriculae. This situation results in an elevated proportion of below mediocre oral presentations regardless of the quality of the research ( the best research studies are often presented poorly because the science research field is in majority composed of non-english speakers )
How did I somehow overcome the double obstacles ( phobia and foreign language ) ?:
1) I stopped caring: I promised myself I would not worry about how I sounded ( prununciation is still an issue) or how I looked (body language: I tend to use my hands when I present things).
2) I would make sure 3 main points would get across to the audience even if I had to repeat them ad vitam eternam. This restriction forced me to organize my thought accordingly and select my words carefully.
3) consequence to #2: Be humble: self-depreciation and a bit of humor were forced upon me as I was often inentionally funny ( mispronoucing roster or crick would have that effect, I will let you guess what I said instead). I figure I will get in on the joke even if it was at my own expense. Do not overdo it though because there is a thin line between humor and stupidity. ( I am not quite sure where it is myself ).
4) Know your audience. You have to anticipate the question. Q&A's is where a line is drawn between a successful or a failed presentation. My roomate still remember after 3 years the tale of the grad student who asked whether his audience was familiar with a biological software that was developped by those same people.( That would fall in the stupid category not the funny one).
5) When all else fails: get a shot of martini ( shaken not stirred :) ) it will loosen you greatly and you can pretend to be 007.

4/1/06

Happy (busy) week-end and Where on earth is ..

I am looking forward to the week-end. Mood of the day: happy !

Several reasons:
1) Cleo the cat is coming home after one night at the hospital.
2) There's a pool party and beach volley-ball games today on campus. A bit chilly outside but still pleasant
3) I am giving tennis lesson for $22/day to a pretty good local JV student. Decent workout, her parents and her are nice folks andthe extra cash is always welcome.:)
4) College basketball Final Four in Indianapolis: Although I don't have ticket ($500??) I am seriously considering hanging out downtown because I might run into Joakim Noah and his crew. First time that I have an invested personal interest inall 4 teams at the final 4: Florida ( Noah of course and my buddy Junior is down there ) , George Mason ( I lived 5 min from the campus when I was in DC and their success is the equivalent of "ligue 2 team Calais"'s run through la "coupe de france" 6 years ago ), UCLA (C'mon, Reggie Miller alma matter ? Reggie's jersey retirement ceremony on thursday was emotional and classy ) and finally LSU ( my home state, and after Hurricane Katrina disaster, they are my personal favorite).
5) Federer in the final of Nasdaq open: watching the genius of Federer at work has become the equivalent of watching "Carmen" at the opera ( must-see event).
So enjoy your week-end because you know I will enjoy mine !
PS: New recurring feature of Rakoto's rants: "WOEI: Where On Earth Is ....?" ...Eric Cantona:
So popular in UK that they had a #1 hit after this French soccer player. So good that he certainly will be the only french guy to ever be crowned "King" in England. He also called the national french coach: Sac a merde ( no need for translation there ).

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